Recognizing the Need for Retreat: Insights from Katherine May's Wintering
In our fast-paced society, where productivity is often valued over the journey of life itself, it's common to feel guilty for taking time to relax, restore, and rejuvenate.
This sense of guilt intensifies during periods of significant loss or change, such as a move, a new job, or personal challenges.
However, in her comforting book Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times, Katherine May invites us to reconsider our approach to life's inevitable ebbs and flows.
She advocates for drawing strength from periods of retreat and rest, which she eloquently refers to as ‘wintering’.
I believe that it’s time we shift our perspective: to stop viewing ‘wintering’ as a mere luxury and start recognizing it as an essential, integral part of our well-being.
May poignantly shares her own experiences, including coping with setbacks and living with undiagnosed autism from a young age.
She uses 'wintering' as a metaphor for the tough times we all face, finding solace and lessons in nature.
May writes, “Wintering is a season in the cold. It is a fallow period in life when you’re cut off from the world, feeling rejected, sidelined, blocked from progress, or cast into the role of an outsider.
Perhaps it results from an illness or a life event such as a bereavement or the birth of a child; perhaps it comes from a humiliation or failure. Perhaps you’re in a period of transition and have temporarily fallen between two worlds. Some wintering creep upon us more slowly, accompanying the protracted death of a relationship, the gradual ratcheting up of caring responsibilities as our parents age, the drip-drip-drip of lost confidence.
Some are appallingly sudden, like discovering one day that your skills are considered obsolete, the company you worked for has gone bankrupt, or your partner is in love with someone new. However it arrives, wintering is usually involuntary, lonely, and deeply painful.”
In the book, May’s journey through a year of self-reflection and healing teaches us the importance of granting ourselves permission to recuperate and rest. Recently, my own 'wintering' period came into sharp focus. In the weeks leading up to our winter break, my youngest daughter underwent a tonsillectomy.
We spent her healing period and the break at home, cocooning ourselves in comfort as a family, which continued even after the holidays. This time has been a balm for our weary spirits since the past six months have been emotionally and physically draining.
Acknowledging the toll of constantly moving forward without pause, I was gifted a Pulsed Electromagnetic Field (PEMF) Therapy Mat for Christmas, a luxury aimed at enhancing and restoring my physical health, which has been ailing lately. This mat, alongside my regular journaling practice, symbolizes my commitment to prioritizing self-care, and continued practice of the pause without guilt. This will give me the opportunity to incorporate ‘wintering’ into my daily schedule.
The following wisdom gained from Wintering by Katherine May helps us learn to accept that winter is part of life:
1. Life's ebb and flow demands rest.
Finding balance reduces stress and increases productivity.
Regular breaks enhance creativity and problem-solving skills.
Rest helps in emotional regulation and mental clarity.
Taking time off boosts long-term motivation and job satisfaction.
Remember, pausing isn't a luxury, it's a necessity for a balanced life.
2. Wintering teaches embracing retreat as a time of growth.
Retreats offer perspective that daily routines can't provide.
They foster self-discovery and deeper self-awareness.
Time away from the norm cultivates resilience and adaptability.
Growth often happens in moments of stillness, not just activity.
Use retreats as stepping stones for personal and professional growth.
3. Katherine May's journey reveals the healing power of pause.
Pausing allows for emotional healing and mental recuperation.
It provides an opportunity to reassess life's priorities.
Quiet moments can lead to breakthrough ideas and solutions.
Restorative breaks can improve overall health and well-being.
Let your pauses be a journey of healing and rediscovery.
4. Discover how to find peace and rejuvenation in your own 'wintering' moments.
Identify activities that relax and rejuvenate you.
Create a dedicated space or routine for regular retreats.
Practice mindfulness to enhance the quality of your rest.
Listen to your body and mind for signs they need a break.
Your path to rejuvenation is unique, explore and embrace it.
Katherine May's writing resonates deeply with me, and I highly recommend her work to anyone who cherishes reflective moments of retreat.
Journaling Prompts for Embracing Your Wintering Season:
Reflect on a recent 'wintering' period in your life. What lessons did this time of retreat teach you?
How do you typically react to periods of stagnation or setback? How might you approach them differently after reading May's insights?
Identify how you allow yourself to rest and rejuvenate. Are there new practices you'd like to try?
Consider the cyclical nature of life as described by May. How does this perspective change your view of current challenges?
Write a letter to your future self, offering advice and encouragement for the next 'wintering' season you might face.
Please comment below to let me know what you wrote about or learned from this. I would love to hear from you!
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